The permanent record

All-Time Standings

Every complete battle ballot also counts toward each entry's global average. Reach 8 ratings to claim an official rank.

Enter a battle

Official Global Leaderboard

8+ ratings

1—
Official AI scouting report
RIPPLE IN DUST
“A ragged note drags across the air like a rake through dry soil.”
Untitled @Th3W1ndBr3ak3r
4.4 seconds
7.8153 ratings
2—
Official AI scouting report
STRONG FINISH
“It starts with a rattle and rolls right into a drawn-out finale.”
The Breakthrough @Th3_W1ndBr3ak3r
9.6 seconds
7.7552 ratings
3—
Official AI scouting report
SINGLE EXTENDED NOTE
“One continuous tone begins, sustains, and tapers off.”
weeping whillow @hallmonitor
8.3 seconds
7.2357 ratings
4—
Official AI scouting report
FRAYED BANNER
“It flaps out once, a flag fraying in a sudden gust.”
ttttt @LucasTheFartKing
4.8 seconds
7.2218 ratings
5—
Official AI scouting report
LOW HORIZON
“A single foghorn rolls across the floor and fades.”
My sweet lullaby @SheSavage
9.8 seconds
7.1338 ratings
6—
Official AI scouting report
DOUBLE PLAY
“We hear a long rough opener, then a shorter follow-up punches through.”
Squeaker Toot @FartistChampion
7.3 seconds
7.119 ratings
7—
Official AI scouting report
SUSTAINED WITH CODA
“Extended attack resolving into a brief coda of three discrete events.”
A Symphony in Ass Major @MyAssIsAnInstrument
8.3 seconds
7.1048 ratings
8—
Official AI scouting report
CLUSTERED CADENCE
“A set of rough, clustered tones hits tightly together.”
Rapscallion Rumps @FlatulentSquire
5.7 seconds
6.8833 ratings
9—
Official AI scouting report
BURST AND HOLD
“Sequence of brief pulses culminating in a longer, continuous tone.”
Juice Rumble @JuiceRumbler
8.8 seconds
6.7942 ratings
10—
Official AI scouting report
TUMBLE OF TONES
“It stumbles forward in rough, windblown gusts.”
lol idk @Vikings94
9.8 seconds
6.7914 ratings
11—
Official AI scouting report
ROUGH CANVAS
“A long brushstroke scrawls over coarse fabric.”
Conshitstent @Fartzkov
7.6 seconds
6.6733 ratings
12—
Official AI scouting report
SERIAL PERCUSSIVE NOTES
“A sequence of discrete bursts occurs with minimal spacing between each one.”
Ripple assfect @Fartzkov
7.3 seconds
6.5435 ratings
13—
Official AI scouting report
RUMBLE OF THUNDER
“Like a quick storm cloud passing overhead, sharp and fleeting.”
Late night exhale @PoopyButt
7.7 seconds
6.5250 ratings
14—
Official AI scouting report
UNBROKEN CADENCE
“The sound carries as a continuous, textured run with no clear end point.”
FARTING GAS FOR REAL @IDKGASSY
3.9 seconds
6.5024 ratings
15—
Official AI scouting report
CHAIN OF FIRECRACKERS
“It pops like a string of firecrackers, each burst spaced a beat apart.”
A B C, A B C @Fartist29
6.6 seconds
6.4736 ratings
16—
Official AI scouting report
BRIEF BURST TRIO
“Three short bursts occur, separated by slight intervals.”
Swingset @gasntooties
5.4 seconds
6.1534 ratings
17—
Official AI scouting report
LONG SLOG
“A rusted zipper dragged open in fits and pauses.”
Untitled @hph
9.8 seconds
5.9224 ratings
18—
Official AI scouting report
FOUR STONES
“Four stones skip across a still pond of silence.”
Steps @FartyPants
7.5 seconds
5.9213 ratings
19—
Official AI scouting report
DEFLATING BALLOON
“It rolls out like a balloon giving up air in fits.”
rare rarerrr @dustin_r
7.5 seconds
5.9212 ratings
20—
Official AI scouting report
LONG PLAY
“We hear a quick start, then a steady run, easing off at the end.”
Zipping up a duffel bag @Fartist29
8.2 seconds
5.7934 ratings
21—
Official AI scouting report
SEQUENTIAL REPORT
“Two separate events. The latter held longer before ending.”
1st to 2nd gear @Fartzkov
9.0 seconds
5.5934 ratings
22—
Official AI scouting report
DRAWN-OUT DELIVERY
“We're hearing a long, uneven tone roll through with gritty resolve.”
nnnnnjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjh v @jkkjnbhvgcf
4.9 seconds
5.5424 ratings
23—
Official AI scouting report
ABRUPT TEXTURE
“This event delivers a quick, gritty burst that ends as abruptly as it begins.”
Untitled @dekiru
3.2 seconds
5.1332 ratings
24—
Official AI scouting report
ASYMMETRIC DUO
“It delivers a quick pair with the second slightly softer and shorter.”
Womwomwom @FogShelf573
3.2 seconds
5.0911 ratings
25—
Official AI scouting report
TWIN BURST PATTERN
“Two short bursts with rough edges, separated by a slight pause.”
Decent little thang. Pop pop @PoopyButt
6.6 seconds
4.9433 ratings
26—
Official AI scouting report
STOP-AND-GO ACTION
“We hear a stuttering note, catching and releasing in quick succession.”
My shart @wetfart
10.1 seconds
4.3523 ratings
27—
Official AI scouting report
LONE ENGINE REV
“A single engine hum stretches out then settles into quiet ground.”
Big Fart @peter
10.1 seconds
4.3324 ratings
28—
Official AI scouting report
WINGED BLIP
“It flits past the ear like a beetle on a mission.”
Hi @sqeakyboi123
4.5 seconds
4.2715 ratings
29—
Official AI scouting report
DOUBLE DRUMMER
“Like two quick taps on a loose snare, separated by a breath.”
Moist matter @Fartzkov
5.6 seconds
3.7135 ratings
30—
Official AI scouting report
BACK-TO-BACK BLIPS
“First burst lands, slight pause, and another follows right on cue.”
no warning @mike1987
4.8 seconds
3.5413 ratings
31—
Official AI scouting report
ABRUPT EVENT
“A lone, brief sound with uneven texture and a sudden stop.”
quick one @dustin_r
2.8 seconds
3.5012 ratings
32—
Official AI scouting report
SINGLE BURST RECORDED
“The sound starts abruptly, sustains briefly, and trails off with a slight sputter.”
Shy firework @Fartzkov
6.9 seconds
3.1338 ratings
33—
Official AI scouting report
SUDDEN ATTACK, RAPID DECAY
“A sharp onset followed by an immediate tapering off.”
for the record @hallmonitor
3.9 seconds
2.8010 ratings
34—
Official AI scouting report
QUICK RELEASE
“And there it is, a brief burst, and it's gone just as fast.”
sunday morning @pattyd
3.1 seconds
1.4715 ratings

Provisional Standings

Fewer than 8 ratings

These positions are live previews, not official ranks. Each entry moves onto the board above when it reaches 8 ratings.

P1
Official AI scouting report
SEQUENCE LOGGED
“Irregular pattern noted, ending with a brief sputter.”
Untitled @mrgassy
5.4 seconds
6.676 / 8 ratings
P2
Official AI scouting report
ONE LONG TONE
“A sustained rasp occurs without interruption.”
Untitled @fart_king11
4.2 seconds
6.005 / 8 ratings
P3
Official AI scouting report
ONE QUICK FLARE
“It arrives raspy and ends without delay.”
Stinky @fartlord
4.6 seconds
5.805 / 8 ratings
P4
Official AI scouting report
UNEASY FINISH
“It arrives as a ragged buzz that tapers off at the end.”
In my mothers car @fartlord
4.1 seconds
5.805 / 8 ratings
P5
Official AI scouting report
PAIRED CADENCE
“Two ragged pulses delivered in close sequence.”
Untitled @Valagszaxofon
6.1 seconds
5.717 / 8 ratings
P6
Official AI scouting report
RUMBLE THEN RATTLE
“It rolls out heavy, then trails off like gravel on tin.”
fat farty @uwu
8.8 seconds
4.754 / 8 ratings
P7
Official AI scouting report
TWO NOTED
“Two discrete events occur in quick sequence.”
Tight lmao @fartlord
5.9 seconds
4.437 / 8 ratings
P8
Official AI scouting report
SPUTTERING SPARK
“A shaky spark jumps in the still air.”
Little but smelly @mrgassy
3.1 seconds
3.676 / 8 ratings
P9
Official AI scouting report
THISTLE IN THE WIND
“One thorny note shakes loose and fades.”
Toot @fartlord
2.2 seconds
3.504 / 8 ratings
P10
Official AI scouting report
SINGLE EVENT
“One irregular note is documented and noted.”
Little toot @fartlord
2.8 seconds
2.176 / 8 ratings
P11
Official AI scouting report
ONE SHOT PLAY
“It hits with a ragged flutter and fades just as quickly.”
fart pro @goat
3.2 seconds
1.867 / 8 ratings
P12
Official AI scouting report
THREE SHOT SEQUENCE
“We hear three sharp reports in rapid succession, all landing clean.”
It just kept going @mrgassyagain
6.7 seconds
—0 / 8 ratings